Okay, so in this new year of life, I’ve decided to make some resolutions. I want to turn things around and make things better for myself. I’ve been tired and grumpy, and lonely, and friendless for far too long now, and it’s about time some things change. I cannot change where I live (yet) or my ethnic background, but there are a few things that I can do to be a better human and have a better life while I’m on this earth.
01. Love God
I want to love God, with a true love. I would never say it out loud, but I really haven’t felt a deep love for God for what seems a long time. There have been a few moments, but my love has been fickle and fleeting. I was happiest when I was all out for God, but I let myself be drawn away by painful experiences. I’ve stopped trusting and depending on the supernatural, but it’s time for me to start believing again.
02. Give Unto Others
I wish to be more generous with others, especially the ones I love- being more thoughtful, giving gifts, sending cards, letters, thank yous, and thinking of yous.
03. Take Care
I must start taking care of myself. Eating right, exercising, all of that. On top of that, I have decided to get therapy for my anger and grief issues which have been spilling into my beautiful marriage. Also, I’ve decided that I need to start getting massages regularly to help reduce stress and nerves.
I plan to begin learning new languages (Spanish, Italian, Hawai’ian, restudy my Korean, Japanese, and French), watch more foreign movies and documentaries, read more books, do some maths, study some philosophy, look at stars, and things like that, so my mind won’t rot or turn into jello.
I need to continue creating things– whether it’s writing, journaling, making mix CDs, playing the uke/guitar/piano/melodica/kazoo/recorder, painting, costuming, doodling, taking pictures… it’s what motivates me and inspires me.
06. Dream Big
I’m ready to open up my possibilities book again and start mapping out some new possibilities. Being here in this small town with people who are satisfied with mediocre has been making me a bit cynical. I didn’t like this place when I was growing up in it, and I like it less after having seen the world. We are the music makers, we are the dreamers of dreams.